I recently watched two movies showing the necessity of forgiveness: I Can Only Imagine and The Railway Man. Both movies showed the necessity, beauty and power of forgiveness. I cried at the crucial point in each movie when forgiveness was finally offered and received after years of living with suppressed anger, bitterness and resentment. Forgiveness in necessary whether or not you believe in God who loves and forgives. Forgiveness is necessary for the person who needs to be forgiven and the person who needs to forgive. Both souls are healed by forgiveness. The healing is spiritual, mental, emotional, relational, and probably also physical.

Christ taught us to pray, “Forgive our sins as we forgive those who sin against us.”

Some people do not want to settle for “win win” – that is, compromise so both parties in a dispute win.

I had a dispute with someone very close to me today. It was about nothing really important. I am ready and willing to settle the dispute. But this other person in the dispute keeps coming at me. She makes her point over and over again until either I yield or I yell. (Yelling turns a spark into a raging fire – self control!) I feel like a suspect being interrogated by persistent detectives who are convinced I committed the crime and are determined to get a confession from me.

What is the biblical way to handle a dispute like this?

I think I can extract a principle from 1 Corinthians 6:1-11. Apostle Paul told Christians suing each other to stop. Don’t allow worldly judges to settle your disputes. Paul asked some very hard questions: “Why not rather suffer wrong? Why not rather be defrauded?” It is better to suffer wrong or be defrauded than to take our disputes before the world. It seems to me like Paul is saying, “Let it go. Don’t fight and become angry and bitter and a bad witness.” If you can suffer wrong and accept being defrauded over something major like Paul’s example, then why not something minor, even trivial? Tell the other person in the dispute, “OK, you win! I give you the last word.” It’s hard because the sinful nature in you (and me) doesn’t want to yield. Of course, if you are wrong and realize it, then apologize.

I heard a sermon recently about being unoffendable or un-offend-able. I went forward for prayer!

Colossians 3:12-14 is an excellent scripture for resolving and ending disputes.

I’m new to this blog stuff, so be patient and kind.  My writings will become more intimate and profound. I used to have a blogspot titled Wilenghart’s Wisdom. I do not know what happened to it. I didn’t pay for it – the domain name? – and it vanished. I will attempt to write wisdom from my interaction with the Spirit and the Word several times a week.

I’m listening to a song by Lincoln Brewster, While I Wait. “I live by faith, and not by sight. Sometimes miracles take time. While I wait, I will worship. Lord, I’ll worship your name. While I wait, I will trust you. Lord, I’ll trust you all the same. You’re faithful every day. Your promises remain.”

This blog is about learning to live with confidence and contentment. Philippians 4:11-13 describes the Apostle Paul’s contentment: “I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content. I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need. I can do all things through Him – Christ Jesus – who strengthens me.”

I am a disciple of Jesus Christ for many years and I’m still learning this. This is my writing about living with confidence and contentment trusting in Christ who gives me strength. Living with confidence and contentment is living without fear. My insecurities make fear my greatest enemy. I am learning how to live by faith. I am learning to be content and live without anxiety because Christ strengthens me as I keep my focus on Him.